My dear boy – my friend,
Time is on your side – so, hold on.
God bless you forever, my son!
With much love
I love this photo of the Earth and Moon. It was taken last month by the Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter. It provides a view of our existence that we very rarely see. Pictures of the Earth are usually partial views from ISS or whole images taken from the moon, but to see the Earth and Moon together and watch their dance is a beautiul sight. In this picture is pretty much everyone who ever lived hanging in the black nothing with our faithful companion so near and yet so far. Viewing our lives in this different perspective is quite profound and I have stared at it in wonder for some time, stirring up motivations and joys that I hadn’t experienced for a while. It reminds me of the value in looking at something familiar in another way. Sometimes I worry about how you may feel you are losing or wasting years of your life and the mental burden that may bring, but then I heard on the radio the statisitic that the average person will spend eight and a half years of their lives watching TV. So I looked at your situation from a different perspective, if you spend every moment you can in pursuit of meaningful and productive goals you actually won’t have lost any time at all on the average person. It’s not the years in your life, it’s the life in your years.
Keep going, we are proud of you.
My greatest desire now is that you will be reading this lines at home. Home with your loving family and friends – home where your heart belongs! My son, you have endured so much injustice during this nightmare, so I just don’t understand – how can you still be standing? God may have given you the strength – but it’s you Oscar, who has been fighting this terrible battle. You have come this far because of God, all the love from people who are caring about you, your inner strength and your ability to focus. Please hold on a little bit longer – search for the light in the darkness and let it lead your way out. Time will be changing …
I know that you’ll never be the same as before – how could you? But I am convinced that you will find another, alternative way through life. A path that will lead you to both happiness and love in the future, even if you don’t think that right now. It’s important that you try to find your own way, through this nightmare and that you just keep on walking, how hard it may seem.
Don’t stop, but let everything take its time (time is on your side … remember), have patience, never lose your Faith in God… in love… and all the beauty around you. I know that it’s easy to get caught up in the darkness and anxiety, but it will not stay for ever – it will fade and pass away, believe me! I get stuck in depression from time to time (often without any direct cause) and I always think it will last for a lifetime – but it doesn’t (and I never learn). I’m sure you will find the meaning of life again. You may have to heal a little bit more, but in time you will be there. You will smell the fragrances… see the beautiful colors around you… and feel the laughter bubble inside you… YOU WILL FEEL ALIVE AGAIN – AND YOU ARE WORTH IT!!!
God bless you my son!
Much of love
On it goes. The tick tick of time that mocks you by moving slower than seems possible, dragging out the time you have been kept away from your family. What must you be thinking, all alone in that cell? Are you wanting the clock to move forward, or are you more scared of the future than of what has already passed? Do you wonder if you have the strength for yet another bout? Well I just know that you have it in you to garner yourself for whatever will come next. I know that you have the courage to square your shoulders, lift your head and quietly, but resolutely, look it in the eye and tell it to move out of your way. Even with a broken heart you’ve made it this far. Against all the odds, you’re still here. So you just listen to that tick tick of the clock, lift your chin up in defiance at its mockery. Because every little tick is a check mark in your favour. Every little tick is a measure of how far you’ve already come.
It’s hard to believe that all these weeks have passed …to us out here time is whizzing by! It seems like only last week we were celebrating Christmas.
I’d like to think that for you time is flying also…..but that’s probably just wishful thinking on my part. I want the next 13 weeks or so to go even faster because I just want you HOME. That awful place is NO place for a lovely guy like you. Please continue to stay strong in mind body and soul.
Love Angela (England) x