Jy sal op ‘n nuwe journey gaan

Oscar,

Dit maak nie saak hoe voorbereid jy dink jy is nie, jy sal nooit ten volle voorbereid wees vir die verlies en verdriet wat gepaardgaan met die dood nie. Dit bring die slegste en die beste in jou uit, en daar is nie ‘n ding soos closure nie. Jy sal vir ewig en altyd treur en spyt wees, en tyd sal nooit ooit genoeg wees nie. Jy sal skuldig voel, jou geloof, jou lewe en jou doel bevraagteken. Hartseer kom nie in ‘n handleiding “for Dummies” nie, dit is morsig en verwarrend. Jy wil mal word van seer, en dit sal altyd ‘n miljoen keer seerder wees as wat jy imagine. Gebeurtenisse, mylpale, verjaarsdae en Kersfees sal vir ewig bittersoet wees. Jy sal jouself, jou identiteit, jou betekenis, jou doel, jou waardes en jou vertroue verloor. Triggers sal oral wees. Mense sal vir jou sê hoe jy moet en nie moet voel nie, dat dinge eers erger raak voor dit beter raak maar niemand besef dat normaal nie meer deel van jou woordeskat is nie. Normaal en numb is sinoniem met mekaar, maar trane sal daar wees – golwe van trane, maar dit sal ook ok wees om nie te huil nie. Jy kan nie hartseer of verlies vergelyk nie. Jou verlies is valid,dis jou eie ek, want jy sal nooit ooit daaroor kom nie. Jy sal wel gewoond raak daaraan, maar tyd is ‘n genadelose leermeester en vat tyd. Jy sal nooit weer jou ou self wees nie, en absoluut niks wat jy in die toekoms doen, sal jou liefde vir die persoon verander nie. Ja, jy sal weer die lewe geniet, jy sal weer liefhê, jy sal op ‘n nuwe journey gaan, nuwe ervarings ondervind of wat ookal, maar nie een van die dinge sal jou liefde vir die persoon wat jy verloor het, verminder nie.

xoxo
Bianca Steyn
Suid-Afrika

English Translation:
It doesn’t matter how prepared you are. You will never be fully prepared for the loss & heartache after the death of a loved one. It will bring out both your good & bad & there is no such thing as closure. You will always grieve, time will never be enough. You will always feel guilty & you will always question you purpose in your life. Heartache does not come in “Heartache For Dummies”. The heart ache could drive you insane & feels a million times harder than you could imagine. Celebrations such as birthdays & Christmas will always be bitter sweet. You will loose yourself, your identity, your purpose in life, your morals & your confidence in yourself. There will always be triggers. People will tell you how you should or should not feel & that you will feel worse before feeling better but no one realizes that normal is no longer part of your vocabulary. Feeling numb & normal will be the same. The tears will always be there but not crying anymore will also be okay. You can not compare heartache & loss. Your loss is real & will never fully recover from your loss. You will however get used to it. Time is relentless & takes time. You will never be the same person & absolutely nothing you do in the future will change the love you had for your loved one. Yes, you will enjoy life again, you will love again. You will begin a new journey & discover new things, but nothing will change the love you had for this person.

Dear Pistorius Family

Dear Pistorius Family,

I have watched, with much grief and sorrow at the henious circumstances you have found yourselves in, but I have also watched with compassion and frankly, awe!

As a family, you have all stood by Oscar, through everything. Through every high and low, and you have done so in a dignified and loving manner!

When Carl was cleared of his charge, you were all there for him, offering him comfort and solace – and now, through these tough times.

Throughout it all, it has been very emotional watching you go through this (and other things we will not know about), but what is clear, is that family means the world to you all – and it is with awe that I say this.

God Bless each and everyone of you.

Love from
Shelley (UK)
xxx

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